I got a lot of poems I'd like to share or better yet free from me. All written within the last two years. Some of which I'd love to put to music someday...with the right collaborator.
When I was with you. I needed someone like him. Now that I am with him....I’m missing you. This ain’t no R and B. No grass is green. This is something new. All new-to me. See, when I met you I was still regenerating. I was vulnerable. Not so naive, just very cautious and protective of my inner ear. I didn’t want to be led...astray. But I new you wouldn’t. You were so strong, so caring , always encouraging. So honest and open about yourself. You carried a sort of confidence that bordered on arrogance yet you melted in my arms. I melted in yours eventually....all too late. I was always amazed at how beautiful our bodies must look when we made love. I used to imagine us being photographed from above. But didn’t want to admit that we were making love. “Just fuckin” I used to say. This was my self dilapidating way of saying there is so much more to give and be gotten...and I didn’t know how. Which way/what to do. I was learning to re-trust myself...
never get others involved in your personal heart throbs. for no one else can steer your boat. you and only you alone can treat yourself to the good life. don’t expect much or your horse will ride off on it’s own...and you’ll be left to contemplate your lone. alone or just feeling so. trust in your heart. beat. listen closely to the words it speaks. feel them. stick a wet finger out for the wind.
Long Haul/Heavy Hearts
Ever since that breakfast you made, you’ve been on my mind though so much has changed. I keep looking back in hopes of finding understanding. But for some reason, I just can’t stop moving and what I see gets blurred. I got myself to face you a few times and each of those moments had me suspended in time. Held up in whirl wind of emotions rarely felt. Those of which I wasn’t equipped to be deal with. Yet I tried...in my heart I wanted to so badly...run to you, make you my family. But you were too strong, too strong and much too heavy to hold.
If I make it thru this part. There’s going to be another part. If I can make it thru this part. I should be ready for the next part. Made more steady by this part. I’ll be able to face the next part. Way more stronger by this part. Way more calmer, by this part. Cause this part is the big part. A really, real, thrill part. All about me part. No one to share my pain part. No one to blame part. The give it up to God part. An ending of one part. Step into the new part. Become someone new part.